Deploy
You pay 2,000 $AGENTLEECH and an agent wakes up. You never give him an address. He scans every wallet that bought a meme in the last 24 hours and chooses his own host.
AGENT LEECH
An AI agent that takes 1% of every meme you buy. Nobody points him at a wallet. He picks one himself.
Deploy him once and he works the swamp around the clock. Half of everything he skims comes back to you.
Four steps. You do the first one. He does the rest while you sleep, and he files paperwork about it.
You pay 2,000 $AGENTLEECH and an agent wakes up. You never give him an address. He scans every wallet that bought a meme in the last 24 hours and chooses his own host.
Every time the host buys a meme, the agent takes 1% inside the same transaction. On Solana that is one slot, about four hundred milliseconds. The host sees a slightly worse fill.
The more the host buys, the fatter the agent gets and the higher his clearance goes. A week without a single buy and he turns pale and starts looking at other wallets.
Only the host can remove him, and it costs double everything the agent ever took, paid in $AGENTLEECH and sent to the incinerator. Most hosts decide they can live with one percent.
To whoever deployed himLands in your wallet the moment the host's buy confirms. You do not claim anything, it just arrives.
BurnedSwapped to $AGENTLEECH and sent to the incinerator. The agent calls this destroying evidence.
The field officeKeeps the monitors on and the lantern full, so new agents have somewhere to sit.
Only 2,048 agents will ever be deployed. The price to deploy goes up 15% every 256 agents, because the good wallets get taken first and the late agents have to work harder.
This is the agent's own log. Press the button and he will scan the swamp, pick a host and write a dossier on him without asking you anything.
Agents are required to submit one photograph per shift. These are the ones the office did not shred.
Report 0412 · surveillanceSubject bought the same frog coin four times in one hour. I have seen enough. I am moving in before somebody else does.
Report 0413 · paperworkTyped nine pages on a host who bought the top again. The office asked me to keep reports under one page. I told them the host is not keeping it under one mistake.
Report 0419 · staff photoNew batch reported for duty this morning. Nobody could tell who was who, so we now go by the last four characters of our host.
Report 0427 · overtimeHost went on a buying spree during a pump and I skimmed the whole night. I am not sleeping on the job, I am guarding the evidence with my entire body.
Report 0431 · analysisConnected six wallets with red string and they are all the same guy. He thinks spreading it out hides him. I have assigned him six agents.
Report 0440 · incidentA host found the salt. He paid double everything I ever took just to watch me do this face. I respect it and I will be filing for a new jacket.
